Wednesday, November 30, 2011

The Chosen One

Pradhyumna or Prads was enjoying the quiet evening and trying to put his mind to some exercise with some chess game with Jeevitha or jeevs when suddenly Swasthee or swats burst in, "I am the Chosen One...", she declared with aplomb
Jeevs didn't like Swats disturbing her brainy session with Prads and she asked her "The Choen one... Don't tell me you have won five crores... you don't have that flashback that would bring tears to the viewers... you cant win it re..."

Swats was still excited, "No... Its not Big B who has made me the chosen one... Its the real Big One... God Almighty who has selected me as the Chosen one..."
Prads looked at her closely and said, "I was searching for dark circles around the eyes...you know... signs of insomnia..."
Jeevs, "No way she can be deprived of sleep. She gets them during the classes...."
Swats shouted, "I am serious!!! He has selected me for a mission..."

Prads moved his queen and shouted checkmate and turning to swats and said lightheartedly, "and what could be the mission... get rid of corruption or make all boys say to their girls. 'Madam...I am your Adam'...."
Swats volunteered to make the chess move for Jeevs and said, "CHECKMATE.. and coming to my mission... it has nothing to do with corruption or boys... its about love... its about..."
Prads used his horse effectively and countered her move and with a deja vu feeling, "I am tired about love... or to say musically, 'not sure about love or life anymore'. So you are chosen to bring the hearts together???"

Swats allowed Jeeves to make the next move as she explained her mission more clearly, "No!!!... My mission is to break hearts... to separate couples..."
Both of them turned towards her with a certain feeling that this girl has gone mad and looked for a explanation
Swats smiled, "Dude's theory... I mean... Gods theory is like this... If best is to come from a man whether be it a poem or working for a social cause, that can be done only when he knows pain and the best form of pain comes from separation... so when he is separated from his dear ones, he will have that pain and in that pain he will do the soul search and he will realize me and the best will come out of him"
Jeevs laughed out loud as she removed Prads' queen and said to him, "She has not come from temple.. she came back from a theater" and turning to Swats, "Did your God look like Ranbir Kapoor..."

Swats got furious, "I don't have the appointment order or gadgets to prove that I am chosen one.. But don't you feel that this is a good mission... People in love tend to forget everything around them... the world needs someone to separate them... so god has selected one..."
Prads spoke out a bit harshly, "God has already made man vulnerable... You take a mans DNA and you will see that the brain or the looks or whatever physical or mental qualities or abilities he has got is from his ancestors... the only thing he can proud to be say 'belongs to me' is the ego...this ego is the one which always make him say something stupid something bad which can never be taken back...this ego would ultimately make him bring pain to others and to himself ultimately... its only a matter of time when he hurts his dear one.. Some do it within a year and some after a decade...So God interfering would be not necessary and God himself would be knowing that one"

Sunday, September 4, 2011

43 DAYS LATER

After 43 days,Pradyumna or prads as his friends call him, opened his eyes from the deep meditation. He had sat for meditation searching for answers along with his young friend viran.(read here) He felt that in the last 43 days, His India had suddenly changed a lot. He guessed it from his mobile forwards. Usually it was filled with lot of crude jokes or some so called inspirational quotes. But now it was just filled with anti corruption jokes and lots of support for a old man called Anna Hazare.

Prads was really thrilled and questioned himself, "Am I in india or have I entered a parallel universe?"
And then into the peaceful street a reporter entered. She introduced herself to the rolling camera, " I am Reporter Sharmistha from NBTV.."
Prads shook his head, "Another news channel has sprouted kya...?"
Viran, his young buddy replied, "NBTV... No Brains Television"

And the reported started her nonsense, "Let us see how the drama of anna hazare has affected India in the most remote places like this temple city"
And the spotlight turned to a worried parent purchasing a tricycle for his kid of six years,
"My son has seen anna hazare all over the television and decided to fast until we give him a tricycle"
The reporter questioned, "Now that must have ruined your budget for the month. What did you do? Went for some salary advance?"
The answer from the man left her surprised, "No! other parents from the neighbour hood contributed some funds... See! They wanted to stop this news from spreading to the entire neighborhood and other kids picking up the practice.So a fund was built and tricycle purchased. "

Moving ahead she found a young man in his thirties placing order for a four wheeler
When the camera got focused on him, he started speaking without waiting for the reporter to put forward the question,"We buy television to our wives so that they can watch those serials and keep their mouths shut for some hours... but now anna hazare has made them open their mouths and raise their demands and showed them ways to have it get done...agar meri biwi fast karegi tho mujhe bhi khane ko nahi milega...usa rokho... koi use rokho"
Prads looked at the reporter and her costume, "she may be covering the news very good... but the same can't be said about other things"

The reporter then caught hold of a young teenage girl who was weeping and washing the tears with her hanky,"The fasting by the old man is also affecting young teenage girls also..."
And the teenage girl said her sad story with sobs, "Today I had a date with a hottest hunk from a software company being friday night... and that too dinner at the JD's restaurant...but anna hazare called the young men of his country to support him and asked them to give some time from their weekend or take compensatory leave..guess my man decided to listen to a 70 year old man rather to a 18 year old girl..."

The reporter turned to the camera with the concluding remarks "See how the boys and girls are suffering in a small temple city because of a fasting of a old man in the distant capital city"
Prads too had to make a concluding comment, "Where do the NBTV recruit their reporters...? from some mental institution!!!"

Saturday, July 23, 2011

The Quest

Father of every teenager has worries and any parent wouldn't disagree with that statement. But this dad had strange worries - Last time around his son Viran had left home just because his father had refused to gift him a motorbike (read here). Now, the young fellow has joined the local mutt to do deep meditation searching for inner meanings and answers.
On the way the worried father met Pradhyumna and his two young friends Swasthee and Jeevitha. On hearing his plight, girls wanted to help him. They just loved the task of disturbing the penance of a youngster... and aren't they good in it

When they arrived, nd then they found the seventeen year old Viran in the mutt his eyes closed. Swats couldn't believe her eyes "With so many cute devotees around you, how can you keep your eyes closed.Un aankhonkee tauheen hain..."
A senior saint opened his eyes when he heard swats' sexy voice and slowly hissed, "when we are on to viagra he is into vairagya... kya kalyug hain?"
Viran answered her without even opening his eyes, "My mind is searching for answers...that google cant find for me..."

Swats found it amusing, "Like..what questions would be set for the coming answers?"
Viran smiled as he spoke very gracefully , "Its not on a micro level... its much bigger than that..."
Jeevs also had to make some witty comment, "Like which country would the united states attack next?"
Viran laughed, "You people are so hooked on to the tv world... Its got to do something spiritual..."
Prads couldn't believe it, "Like... Why we are born?... rather like why we are born as human?.. or to be specific... like why are we born as a males?"
The young man smiled, "I already have those answers.. Darwin, Adam and my biology teacher have helped me there... I am onto something bigger..."
The three waited with much breath to listen to him. And Viran opened his eyes and told his doubts,"Its like why we boys fall for girls head over heels?"

Swats and Jeevs coudn't control their laughter,"Eons may pass... you will never get the answer..."
The young man had deeper questions, "Why we boys run back into them even when they treat us as jerks? why?"
Prads was amazed at the boy's quest for answers.
And young man continued, "And we keep remembering them even when they have left us and married someone else and have a kid and not even give our name to that kid at least...why?
Swats and Jeevs looked at the changes in their dear friend Prads' face.They hoped Prads would say something to bring Viran outside...But the opposite happened as Prads announced,"I think you are right... Even I am a victim of this moha"... Turning to swats and jeevs, he said, "Girls... You carry forward without me..."
And saying that he took the seat next to Viran

Sunday, June 12, 2011

All About Emotions

"What has reporting got to do with emotions?" came the furious question from Swats or Swasthee, a journalist student. Seeing their elder friend Pradhyumna or Prads silent and just observing the railway track, Jeevitha or Jeevs said to Swats, "You failed the first test of journalism. Capturing the audience interest at the onset.... Let me try it..." and turning to Prads, "What do you say when our teacher tells this lady barkha dutt aspirant to give a emotional-write up like Kavi Kalidas", Prads spoke up, "Now thats something nice.... And what emotion you are trying to cover, Swats....?"
Swats was completely clueless, "Should I write about the anger of the girl whose boyfriend failed to make it to the date or about the eagerness of the harry potter fan for the release of the last installment...."

Prads felt awkward, "I don't suppose your teacher would have had those things in mind when she told about emotions...."
Jeevs knew exactly the content and coverage of emotions, "See... It should be something like a mother not shedding a tear on hearing her son's death in the kargil war, Husband and wife not having a word over the lunch after a fight and yet no one coming forward to say a sorry...or something of the sort"
Prads added his observation , "If you see the world through the eyes of a poet, there would be a thousand emotions. Look at that girl over there waiting for the train to come." As Swats and Jeevs looked at the pointed direction, they found a young girl of around twenty looking at the tracks as if she was waiting for a train. And then she glanced outside for a long time and then covered her face with both her hands and the head completely bend down. Prads expressed his opinion, " It looks like that she is bidding goodbye to this small town which has looked her grow from a small baby to a beautiful girl....Isn't that a nice emotion to write about."

Jeevs couldn't be a left behind and she started her play with words when she saw a small sandstorm, "Seems this land loves her dearly. Look at the way it is raising into the air from the ground as if it is telling her, 'Tu jaha jaha chalegi...'"
Swats stopped her midway, "Those lines seems to be sung by the coolies over there... Look at the way they are looking at her... When she goes away today, they will definitely drown their sorrows in beer bottles..."
Prads reprimanded her on her remarks, "Your teacher wanted to look through the eyes of poet... and not through the eyes of a critic"

Jeevs seemed to be more involved than Swats "Look at the langa-dhavani.... The way she has worn it tells me she has never worn it before... The very emotion of a girl leaving her mother's place to go to her husband's place could be seen in those eyes... The dress shows her association with this small town..."
Again the guessing mind of Swats woke up, "What if she is waiting for her boyfriend and they have planned to elope and run away and get married... ?"
Prads didn't like these words, "Reserve your what if's for your management classes... The girls demeanour doesn't indicate anything romantic at all. There is no iota of tension on her face... It could be she may be leaving for a distant college or she is leaving the place after completing her studies..."

And the train approached and the girl got onto her feet and ran towards the approaching train with too much anxiety...
Swats smiled, "Guys! She seems to be eager to get out of the place... oh... you want me to say it poetically... like I eagerly wait for the history lecture to get over..."
Now Prads doubted his earlier pondering s and started his maybes, "Maybe she was waiting for someone... someone she has not seen for a long time..."
And a very healthy man with a very round face about thirty five years got down from the train with two heavy suitcases. The girl ran down to him and helped him with the suitcases. She even carried one on her head..
Jeevs was dumbstuck, "Gosh... What's happening here? What kind of emotion is this? Compassion?"

Just then a coolie spitted at the sight, "This girl!She is a bitch! The day she joined as a coolie, she has been taking away some nice customers under our very nose..."
Prads and Jeevs shouted in unison, "A girl coolieeee!!!!!!"
Swats smiled and teased them, "These days girls are everywhere... Girls at signals as Traffic police directing the vehicles...Girls as bus conductors handing over tickets... Girls at Petrol pumps filling the gas for your vehicles... And now at railway stations carrying off your loads... Yo! Girl Power... This makes a great story... a great emotional story"

Sunday, June 5, 2011

What Goes Into Getting A Yes

"Two-thousand five hundred short", shouted Jeevs. Jeevs or Jeevitha was disheartened at the funds collected for the summer tour planned for her batch of first years. She poured her heart out to her class-mate Swasthee or Swats and their senior friend Pradhyumna or Prads over a cup of coffee. And her story of plight was abruptly interrupted by Surendra, colleague of Prads.

Surendra requested for some help. Prads innocently asked, "Go ahead. Ask me.. Is it some project you have been doing...or do you want some money?" Surendra shook his head, "No re!... I have been rejected once again..." Prads was not able to understand his friend completely and confusingly asked, "You are looking for a job change?" Girls are quick in grasping things and so was Swats as she put it nicely, "They say face is the mirror of the mind... I don't know about that... but here Suri's face looks like a noticeboard to me and the noticeboard reads 'I have been again rejected by a girl'"

Suri asked the young girls, "Whats wrong with me? Is it my looks???" Jeevs looked at Swats and Swats teased Suri, "If looks could kill.. we would have been in the ICU by now, with you standing in front of us. I think beauty is in the eyes of the beholder... ", Jeevs was more critical, "Its boys who always look for the beauty... I have not seen a male poet or a writer who doesn't describe the heroine's figure and anatomy when it comes to her introduction... And if the girls look for the same in a boy, how can you men object to that...."

Prads saw that Suri was saddened by the comment and he tried to divert the topic from looks, "But girls above 25 look much more than looks. They look for security etc...." Suri got back into the conversation, "Yeah... And this girl was twenty six......"
Swats found that a bit absurd, "All those things like job, security comes before the ladki-dekho program... In the event of ladki-dekho, it all depends on how the boy presents himself..."
Suri found it unacceptable, "Its not a job interview!! Here there are elders to do that job for me..." Jeevs found it absurd, "Shit! 'Elders to do that job for me?' Would you say the same thing to your wife on the first night..."
Swats decided to cool Jeevs, "Jeevs! Its not that Suri can't present himself.... Its his respect for elders that stops himself from talking about himself in front of them... Remember his favorite book is Ramayana..."

Prads found that teenagers were hurting his friend and they were not aware of it, "Suri! Girls these days expect more from the boys.She may have wanted to tell you her vision of what she wants from her husband and whats her future ambitions....."
Innocent Suri summed his thoughts, "On seeing her, I was ready to fulfill all her aspirations. I didn't think for a second if those aspirations would clash with my ideals."
Jeevs laughed out loud, "Even in bollywood, they have stopped using such lines... Come out of the east-man color movies of the seventies.."
Swats was more polite in answering, "Even your close friend Prads couldn't read your mind when you first told him that you got rejected. Then how can you expect the girl, a complete stranger to believe that you would place the world at her feet and fulfill all her dreams..."

Suri was able to comprehend Swats words, "Hmmm... I need to change my mindset completely... How I'd love to have someone who could give me a crash course for this ladki-dekho program..."
Jeevs now rose for the occasion with enthusiasm, "I can train you in a week... All it would cost is just Rupees two thousand five hundred only...And I will make Girls see you in an avataar that they can't resist."

Sunday, May 29, 2011

The Golden Balloon

However busy one is, one needs to take time out to celebrate his good friend's birthday. Yups! It was Swats birthday and wasn't she delighted to see her elder friend Prads waiting for her outside the campus waiting for the classes to get over.
The birthday girl made her way out of the campus along with Jeevitha (Jeevs).

She asked Prads, what every birthday girl would normally ask, "Where is my birthday gift?" Prads smiled, "Tell me what do you want and I will get it for you. But don't ask me for the moon or Rahul Dravid. " Just then a colorful van whizzed passed them up and the van contained all types of balloons and Swats,like Sita Mata spoke, "Wow! what a colorful balloon. I have never seen such a golden balloon. Pradhyumna! I want that golden balloon as my gift..."

Prads got into action and jump started his bike just to be stopped by Jeevs as she spoke some philosophical nonsense, "Its all Maya...Illusion. Can't you see! Like Sita fell for the maya of the golden deer, so is this great lady here... falling for the maya of the golden baloon. She sent her husband Lord Ram and rest is history... "
Swats shouted at her friend Jeevs, "He is not Lord Ram and you are not Lucky Singh either... " Swats didn't complain about her being compared to Sita because she knew Sita was very beautiful. Swats turned to Prads, "What are you waiting for! Its normal for Jeevs to get jealous on seeing a boy like you doing anything for me...."

Prads went behind the Golden balloon not wanting to be sandwiched between these two girls. As he went around the turn some yards away and disappeared from their eyesight, they heard a thud sound and a shriek from Prads.
Swats got a lump in her throat as Jeevs joked, "Seems like that he has been wasted"
Swats gave a frantic call, "Start your vehicle...lets go find him now..."
Jeevs laughed, "Its hardly that distance. Go walking and find for yourself. Nautanki math kar...."

Swats shows her golden feet,"I am wearing golden heels re.. Those balloons had a matching color. That's why I insisted them... I can't run, baby!..."
Jeevs thought Swats was acting too smart and she spoke in the 'ramayana spirit' "I am not leaving you alone in this college ashram..."
Swats wanted to bash her, "Seems... you are possessed by your dead granny's spirit. I know there are many ravans here. They have just one head, but they look as though they have twenty eyes. But I can take care of myself..."

Jeevs refused to leave the place nor allowed her vehicle to be touched by Swats. Swats lost her cool and shouted, "If you don't do something now to help my friend out, I will throw these heels at your face"
Jeevs laughed, "If you can remove the heels to do a act of violence like hitting me why can't you remove it and run down the street and find for yourself what happened to Prads?"
Without waiting for Swats to answer, "I will tell you why you will not do like that. You have lost the power to make proper decisions. That has happened because your Buddhi(thinking) has become brasth (corrupt). And your buddhi became brasth because you got krodh (angry). And you got angry, because you had kaam (desire). And you got Kaam because of Sangham (Proximity)...."
It was the height of puranic overdose and without thinking further, Swats took her heels and flung it at Jeevs who was had stepped two steps back. Jeevs ducked and escaped from being hit. But Poor Prads with bruised feet who had made it to the campus gate was hit by the heels in his right eye"

A crowd gathered to see what was happening and the college principal came down asking for an explanation. Prads didn't know what to say and very stupidly handed the baloon to Swats and said, " MANY MANY HAPPY RETURNS OF THE DAY"

Sunday, May 8, 2011

The Swayamvar

Swats or Swasthee got bored waiting for the pooja at the temple and asked her elder friend Pradhyumna or Prad, who had forced her to come there to tell her a pucca time-pass story. Prads thought that a mythological story would suit the situation. But she wanted something futuristic. So Prads smiled and decides to convert the mythological story he had selected into a story of Swats herself from the pages of her future life,
*********************
"It was Swats' 24th birthday and her father has arranged for her swamayamvar. Who's who of India were there. IPL superstars. Bollywood heroes. Indian Idol singers. Even the Gods in the heaven wanted to attend the swayamvar after hearing about her beauty. But sage Narad, the heavenly wanderer of the seven worlds told them that the girl had already selected a simple human soul as her life partner and the garland would be put around his necks
Her selection looked like a mixture of Harry Potter and Abhishek... only difference is he didn't had a wand and he was not a flop show. And his name was Rahul.But the Gods became jealous and Lord Varun said "He may have cast his spells, but we too have some tricks in our bags..." and Lord Vayu added "and he may be lucky till now. But not any more."
The four gods decide to make her choice very difficult by participating n the Swayamvar by taking on Rahul's appearance. When Swasthee came to the stage with the garland in her hands, she found five rahuls to her surprise. And she was not Draupadi to select five men as her husbands.Swayamvars usually had a MC who would introduce the eligible bridegrooms. For this swayamvar, Goddess Saraswathi was herself the MC. And Swats looked towards her for help. Saraswathi had a tough task on her hand. Being a Goddess, she cant allow the Gods lie to be caught because of her and at the same time, being a woman, she didn't want to do injustice to Swats.

The four gods are Agni, Vayu, Indra and Varuna. Saraswathi introduced the first guy, I mean, the first Lord, Lord Agni "This guy is Rahul....Rahul Number 1...He is from the City of Gods i.e Kerala and a doctor by profession. When he keeps his stethoscope on young girls heart, their heart beats stop... And yes, he loves idlis....."
Saraswathi was stressing on the word idli and Swats immediately ordered idlis. The white idlis when it went into mouth of the fire god, it automatically became Black.
Swats said, "Are you eating idlis or black coal?" And she said without thinking she was talking to a God, "You are fired..."

Next Rahul was the cool Lord Varun, the lord of rains. "This is Rahul... Rahul number 2... doesn't he look really cool?"
Swats listened carefully and read between the lines and guessed that this guy was also a impostor and said, "You look cool with a pretty face.But you could be fool with a dirty mind.How to know your mind is beautiful?... my psychiatrist friend once said that a person with a good mind would have really nice handwriting. Would you write a prem-pathr addressed to me?"
The rain-god didn't foresee the trick and fell for it. Swats ordered paper and pen and as soon Lord Varun touched the paper,it became wet.
Swats smiled, "I knew kids who wetted their pants with fear...I muss say dude you sweat buckets...."

Now Goddess Saraswathi came to the third Rahul.. Lord Vayu... The Air god., "Here is Rahul... Rahul number three.... is he your rahul? The one whose name you want to write in every breath of yours.... "
Swats guessed it and without shyness declared, "Gosh! I am sure you are mine and I want to feel you in my arms before I garland you."
Lord Vayu was not prepared for this when Swats suddenly embraced her in front of everyone and.... did she feel anything???. She felt nothing...only emptiness because air has no substance, "Wow! You are so light weight....Damn! You just got dissolved in ma arms.Don't you think you are a bit too romantic? I need someone realistic......."

Next in line was Lord Indra, God of the heavens. Goddess Saraswathi herself didn't like Indra. Indra was known for roving eyes and earlier had been known for trapping wives of rishis when they were not at home,"This guy is Rahul... Rahul number four... He may have seen many girls, but once his eyes fell on you, he has not seen any other girls.. Bring any apsara before him and he will not be tempted..."
Swats got the message, "You mean he has his indriyas under his control. So all the apsaras of the heaven like Rambha, Menaka and Thilothamma won't have any effect on him.." she deliberately missed one apsara.
So Indra spoke out without even thinking, "You missed my favorite one... Urvashi..."
Swats gracefully told him, "O Lord! You might get many other. But I need a one woman man"
All the gods made their exit after praising Swats for her intelligence and giving her their blessings...
Swats then looked at the real Rahul and said...."I always knew you are the one. From the time I saw this shyness of yours I fell for u. People could copy your looks but not your innocence..."
*****************
Suddenly the prayer bells rang and everyone was called for pooja and Swats had only one wish, "Oh God! Make this story come true in the future...at least some parts..."

(Adapted from Damayanthi Swayamvar appearing in the Mahabharatha)

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Till Death do us apart... Can it?

"Some people never grow up.. As a kid, they have this ability of conjuring false stories around them.. And they keep holding on to it, even after they have grown up" ,said Pradhyumna to his young friend Swasthee. Swats was surprised and she queried, "Whom are you refering to..."
Prads didn't had to answer. All he did was point his finger at the cafe's entrance. There was Spandana, Swats good friend. Though she was intelligent, it seemed that she just told hard to believe real life experiences. And that day also she had a tale to tell.

Swats tried to make the environment a bit romantic and broached up a topic, "I love the atmosphere at the cafe. There are so many beautiful pairs.They seem to be made for each other..."
Prads rebuked the statement, "There is no such thing as 'made for each other'.All of them are 'mad for each other'. And you just can't say by looking at them that they are made for each other. You have to see their entire life as to how they live their life for each other"
Spandana agreed on that one, "That reminds me of my uncle Sudeep and his wife Ragini..."

Prads just smiled and whispered to Swats, "Shatabdhi express suro hogayii..." And no one dared to stop Spandana, "My aunt Ragini and uncle Sudeep came to the big bad city some five years back to settle down after they got married. Uncle Sudeep had got a job in the RTO. They were looking for a home to be called their own." As if to irritate Prads, Spandana broke into a song, "Do deewane sheher mein... abudhana dhoondthe hain." Prads chose to remain silent after observing her very long polished nails.
Spandana's story suddenly turned mysterious after the song, "At the first house,my uncle experienced something very strange. He felt as if he was being smocked by some invisible forces. He felt it hard to breath.My uncle felt some extreme heat inside the building. The broker got them out of the apartment and into the open air..."
Prads had to comment, "May be... he got the premonition of his wife choking him to death on his failure to gift her on their first wedding anniversary"

Spandana was totally absorbed in the story, "A minute after they walked out of the apartment, the whole apartment went up in flames. The broker was shocked and thanked my uncle for saving his life and also commented, 'You are gifted and able to foresee the danger...' But my uncle thought otherwise and said that it was just a coincidence."
Prads smiled at the way she was building up the story, "And you too are gifted...."

Spandana continued her 'real' story, "If a strange thing happens once, it should happen again. So it did...My aunt and uncle were showed another apartment which was still at the construction stage...And this time my uncle felt something sharp and heavy fall on his head and that too from great heights. There was no injury marks, but my uncle just couldn't explain the pain he was going through. They took him to a side tea stall. Before even they could take a sip of their tea, they heard a deafening sound. They looked across the road and saw that a huge pane of glass which was being lifted by a crane to be fixed on the eleventh floor fell onto the ground crushing some bystanders"
Prads. criticized Spandana's story, "Are you are just telling the story to entertain us? or does it really have anything to do with the statement 'Made for each other'?"

Spandana cleared her thought, "Listen completely!!! My Uncle thought that this was far more than premonition. His mind started giving him crazy ideas. He got the feeling that maybe death was after him.If this went on, then his life would be hell and so would be the life of his dear wife ragini who has to bear with it all."
Prads knew the next part, "And so he decided to make the sacrifice and leave his wife... Love triangle hain kya? I mean... tumhare aunt ka koi purana boyfirend tha..."
Spandana, "No! For her uncle was the world.. But my uncle refused and left her and started staying alone.And then one day he got the news that his wife has met with an accident and was in a critical condition. He immediately run to the hospital. There he saw a blackish apparition that no one else present there were able to see...It was death himself... And it talked to my uncle..."

Prads couldn't control himself laughing, "Spandana! Thank you very much. Though I am thirty two, many say I just look like sixteen years. You must have taken them seriously"
Spandana was more focused on the climax of her story "Death like any typical bollywood villain had to tell my uncle his scheme, 'You are such a fool... I was always after your wife... but because of your selfless love, your soul was able to foresee the danger and save her life every time I came close to her... but your mind ditched you completely by depicting the picture that you could bring her some harm... and you believed it and deserted your wife making my job very easy...Why can't u be like that hero who said 'Ek baar jo maine commitment kar diĆ¢...uske baad toh main khud ki bhi nahin sunta!' You shouldn't have listened to yourself"
Prads laughed and slowly whispered to Swats, "The movie 'Wanted' released just a year ago...as far as I know"
Spandana didn't hear it as she had completely lost hold of the real word "Just then doctor came in and with a dull face showered the bad news to my uncle that Ragini was showing unexpected changes in her health conditions and it was impossible to treat her. At that time my uncle began to experience some changes in health and he got suddenly ill and started sweating profusely as if his blood pressure rose...My Uncle maintained his pose and said to the doctor, "Gosh! Please put me on observation... by observing me, you will know what dangers await her in advance and accordingly you can treat her. As you have no other alternative, you need to agree on this one"
Prads started loving the crazy story, "And the rational doctor believed it and started treating Ragini by observing changes in your uncle . Must be first such case in medical history ..."
Spandana smiled, "Yes... and then they saved her... Death put his tail between his legs and departed from the scene..."
Swats put an end to the story ,"And they lived happily till death did them apart...
err I mean.. It can't..."

Prads paid the bill and prepared to leave, "Spandana, I don't know what you will become in life. But one thing is for sure.. U will be a great mother who will put her kids to bed very easily with some very 'real life experiences'"

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Sajjanre Jhoot Math Bolo...

"Don't wait for things to happen.. make them happen"
Swats believed in the quote and she wanted to bring love into the life of her good friend Pradhyumn or Prads. She was trying her best though providence didn't seem to support her.The girl she had in her mind was her senior Spandana. Their first meeting was disastrous (Read here). But Swats was not to be dejected by such incidents . So she whisked away Prads once again and this time to spandana's home to meet her family.

Prads opened the heavy gates to her home and kept his left foot first. And then a frantic young man came running out of the house and fled past them, all the time yelling like a madman, "I thought I was going to see a angel. But there is a devil inside which feeds on human parts.." Swats felt a little odd and sensed that it was very bad timing. Looking at the young man who was happy to see the open gates, Prads crooned humorously (from the eagles hotel california) pointing at the house, "You can check out any time you want, but you can never leave..."

It definitely was not a Ghost House as they found worried parents on the Sofa and a full-bindas girl who has come of marriagble age, Spandana, in front of the computer. Prads who was neither young nor old was able to read the plight of the parents, "Another proposal rejected by your girl?" Before they could answer, Angry voice of Spandana filled the entire house, "I didn't reject him.... You will never believe as to what happened here before you guys moved in... " and she narrated the story

"When I was told that a boy called Sajjan was coming to see me, I was confused. As a young girl, I also dreamed of love and marriage. But I also dream of being independent and being self sufficient. So I turned to the net for help. And exactly on the strike of twelve, a fairy god mother appeared....on my google chat window and after hearing my story handed me the first edition of Pinocchio and like our family priest, advised me, 'Light a lamp in front of this book and read this story 12 times before next day morning and see the results' I didn't question her and did as I was instructed to do...

Next day, the bridegroom appeared and he failed to sweep me off my feet. I kept my mouth shut and eyes fixed on the clock hoping to see his back at the earliest. But my good parents vacated the room allowing us much unwanted privacy to speak our hearts out. And it seemed, whenever he opened his mouth, he said only things in his praise and that too, lies, 'I did my Ph.d In Economics from Win-Cheaters University and now working for the logistics department for a health-care facility in States. Though I am working abroad for a long time, I have not picked up any bad habits like smoking and drinking.' Suddenly Sajjan's nose began to shrink. And I began to laugh out aloud realizing that fairy god mother was working her spell. The spell was a newer version and with some modification - whenever the guy lies, his nose would shrink rather than grow.

Seeing me smile, the modern day Pinocchio started making confessions,'Hmm... I do smoke but not more than 2 smokes a day... I do drink but only when there is a occasion to do so..." The nose shrank further and that had me in complete splits. Cupid struck the boy as he admitted, "You have a beautiful smile. I loved those dimples. I have never seen a girl with such a beautiful smile..." And I laughed more not for his silly romantic lines but for his fast shrinking nose. I wanted to see them disappear

So I put forward my feelings, "I am not expecting a perfect boy with no vices whatsoever. All I want from my boy is not take the name of his old girlfriends in front of me and to be at home before the sun sets and be faithful to me..." And the boy dropped to his knees and proclaimed and it looked to be taken directly from his curriculum vitae, 'If I get appointed as your husband, I promise to serve you with utmost faith and love and so on... ' and I went 'Wow' as I saw his nose nearing to its extinction from his face.

I had to reject the proposal and did it in a cool manner,"Don't take me wrong. But I feel you are desperate and isliye lying all the way. I want someone who is more truthful and one who speaks his hearts out without being afraid....I hope you are not hurt' Sajjan was really hurt yet lied, 'No! Its okay. Your life and your choice.'...."
And before Spandana could complete the story, Prads interrupted with a stern voice, "And his nose completely disappeared. He realized this as he went to the washroom to wash his REAL tears. The frightened guy just let out shrieks and ran out of the house...Rite???"

Spandana was dipped in the pleasure she was deriving from the story, "Yups! Exactly!"
Spandana's mother had prepared a cake for the occasion and Spandana wanted to celebrate and she started with the outer cream. That's when Prads bluntly said, "Do you think I would digest this stupid story of yours? Why it couldn't be that you got tired of his lies and just landed a punch on his face?"
Spandanda looked at him with the cream filled hand which stopped midway to her mouth, "No! I didn't do anything like that...."
Prads laughed and said, "Look! your nose has already started shrinking"
Spandanda placed her cream filled hands on her nose and she looked no different than a buffoon from the local circus.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Is this called 'Falling in Love' ?

Swasthee or Swats had promised her friend Spandana that she would come down to pick her up. So even if it was eight o clock she was there at the station. Very courageous. Any girl would be when she has a elderly friend like Pradhyumna or Prads besides her. And when the train finally arrived, Swats had a wise comment to be made which was definitely picked from somewhere,"Now I know what does IST mean... Indian Stretchable Time..." As soon as the train arrived, Prads was made the coolie and the luggage got shifted from the train to the bus. They still had some sixty kilometers to covered by the bus.

Spandana looked still energetic and instead of taking a little nap, she took up another book and started reading it.Definitely the book was not some paper back novel.Rather it had such heavy words like finance and commerce that made Swats jaw drop and eyes feel sleepy. She turned towards Prads and saw him selecting some songs on his music player.

Girls sometimes get strange ideas and what is even strange is that the Lord Almighty says yes to it. Looking once at Prads and then at Spandana, Swats started dreaming of prads falling in love with Spandana.And like the witch in the old siticom bewitched, she twitched her nose. And it seemed to work though not as Swats would have liked it. Prads felt that music could be better enjoyed with lights switched off and asked the driver of the bus to do ao.

When the lights got switched, Spandana's moods also got switched. Now anger was written all over her face as she shouted at the conductor, "Abhe Andhe! Can't you see... I am reading...#@^*&%~ "
Prads was amazed by the language of Spandana. Swats looked at Prads' dumb-stuck face and expressed to herself, "Don't tell me that he is falling for her selection of abusive words"

Prads was a gentleman and said very gently "Madam! It is not at all healthy to read in a moving bus... and besides tat, I thought you must be really tired from the train journey... You should take some rest"
But Spandana was not the type who liked being told what was wrong and what was right, "Even in computers, I don't ever click the help button..."
Swats immediately gave a angelic smile and thought, "Dialogue maar rahi hain... is she trying to impress my handsome friend"
Spandana continued, "I know what's best for me... Keep your advice in your own pockets...Mind it, Idiot!!!!"

Prads who didn't raise his voice till now lost his cool, "Gosh! Why am I unnecessarily getting into a brawl with you, egoistic girl! Read a novel or do whatever you wish... I don't mind at all!!! Burn in hell!!!"
Swats was disappointed, "In the first rendezvous itself, they are cursing each other. Even those MLAs in the parliament are slightly better. How will love bloom in such a atmosphere. Oh God! I thought you said yes to my wish.."

Then she heard a voice in her mind.She was not sure it was her atma-sakshi(inner conscience) or the almighty himself answering her. But She felt it was God's voice because she heard a male voice answer her, "Haven't u seen those romantic bollywood movie.When somebody hates someone they think more of them... more than they would have had they loved them. And in the first rendezvous there should always be a war of words. Now they go home and yearn to see each other so that they can curse once again and would be waiting for the next time...This yearning would make them definitely come together once again and then see for yourself what would happen!!!"

Swats didn't like the waiting game but she couldn't do anything, "Damn You! God! You leave me with no choice."

Saturday, April 2, 2011

She deserves better

Pradhyumna's parents were at Karthika's place discussing as to how the marriage proposal was to be finalized. Swasthee, being Prad's good friend should have been present there. But she was at the local beach with Prad's best buddy Surendra.

Surendra felt betrayed by his best friend Pradhyumna. He found Pradhyumna guilty of stealing his girl Ksrthika. Swasthee thought surendra may be suffering from a severe heartache and may need some consolation.

But Surendra was a strong person and said with a angelic face, "She got what she deserves..."
Swats still pricked him, "But don't tell me you are not mad at your best buddy"
Surendra said. "I think she deserved some one better than ma and Prads is the best choice..."
Swats was surprised by the words. At the same time she felt sad that her task was cut short.She loved the task of consoling muscular men who wept buckets in front of her.

Surendra carried forward the conversation, "A panchathantra story helped me to come out of this." Swats may have been transformed from a playful child to a beautiful girl a long time back but she was still a child in her heart and wanted to listen to the story. Surendra sat down for his story telling session,"There was a sage living near the banks of a river. Once he found a small rat and took some special care of it. The care turned into liking and he got the rat converted into a cute baby girl. The sage brought it up like his own child and gave it all the love and education. Soon, it turned to a beautiful girl and it was the time for its marriage. That's when sage decided that she had to get the best"

Swats was enjoying this story where the girl was the center of the attention, "Girls should be given all the attention. Did the sage arrange a swayamvara for her?"
Surendra shook his head, "More than that! The sage decided that the strongest one in the world should get the hands of his adopted girl. So he asked Adithya to make his presence felt there"
Swats good a bit confused, "Adithya chopra? maker of dilwala dulhaniya le jayenge... how is he powerful? He only makes young girls weak by making them dream a lot."
Surendra continued, "Adithya, the maker of days and nights. The largest of the stars, the sun himself. But the rat-girl refused vehemently saying 'he is too hot to handle'...."
Swats smiled, "She's right. Being hot is the quality of a girl not of a boy... she very well knew that..."

Surendra continued, "Adithya, the sun god thanked his stars and advised the sage on the powerful one he knew, 'It is the Megh-Raj, (Lord of clouds) who is the strongest... before him I am nothing... when he shows up on the horizon that too in his darkest form, he makes me go into hiding like Bush did to Osama..."
So Megh-Raj was summoned immediately. Megh-Raj came down and the rat girl's face showed her dislike, "He is too dark, Daddy!"
Swats broke into a song, "hum kaale hain tho kya hua... dil waala hain... Megh-Raj must have said something like that na..."
Surendra smiled a bit, "No! He is not a nautanki like you. Rather he was happy on the proposal getting quashed and advised the sage, "Dear learned one. I am not the strongest. When the winds come,I am nowhere to be seen... "

Surendra allowed the cool breeze to brush through his hairs before continuing the story, "But the girl refused the wind lord too saying, 'He is too chanchal...He doesn't stay at one place... how can I make him dance to my tune all the time... NO!... papa... No!. The wind lord looked at the girl and suggested the bride's father, "I think you have misjudged me. There is someone stronger than me. That is Parbath Singh (The Mountain Prince).When a mountain shows up on my path, I just bow down to him. Only poets say 'hum chatton ko heela saktha hain' I definitely cant."
Swats didn't disturb the flow of the story and was eagerly waiting to know the var the rat-girl had selected.
Surendra started the parbhat singh's tale, "Parbhat singh came on to the stage. The rat girl instantly took a dislike to him,"Father, look at him! His belly is showing up.If this is the state now, just think what would happen ten years from now. How can I go to parties with him without getting embarrased."

Swats found the girl a bit too choosy, "If she goes on rejecting offers like this, she may end up being a kuvari..."
Surendra was nearing the end of the story, "Parbhat singh was sad, but he decided to help the old sage and dispensed his advice, "She is right...I am big and fat and i am also not the strongest. I should be humble enough to accept this. A creature which is much much smaller than me makes me cry a lot.He makes thousand holes inside me and digs mud out of me... in a way he is taking the life out of me". The sage without even thinking spoke, "Who is that guy?" and sprinkling some water onto the air, he made the creature appear in front of him. And there was no bounds for girls joys as the creature appeared before her. The girl liked him immediately and instantly choose him as her husband, "Small, Short and simple. Nice eyes.. Nice teeth.. I love him" It was a male rat!!! The sage learned his lesson and with a sigh declared, "Whatever one does, one can't change the destiny. He will get only what he deserves. You deserve a rat and you got it."

Swats was not at all happy on hearing the climax of the story and she chased Surendra all aroung the place cursing him and shouting out loud, "How dare you address my good friend prads as a rat?"

Thursday, March 24, 2011

I want to live....

Prads was traveling along with Swats to the place of Karthika, the new girl in his life. The public transport vehicle they were traveling in was much like a ghost vehicle with the driver at the wheels and the conductor at the other end and there were hardly ten passengers including Prads and Swats.
There was no music playing inside the vehicle.Yet Prads was lost in his own world. From the small coastal town, he went to the big bad city to the girl who had said goodbye to him. Swats realized this from his sober face and immediately got up and instructed the conductor to bring the vehicle to stop.

As Swats got down and the bus prepared to move,a speeding lorry came from the corner and just smashed the bus from the behind...reducing it to smithereens. Swats was left speechless by the site of the destruction. She just prayed that nothing would have happened to her good friend Prads.

But at the moment of collision, All thoughts came running to his mind. His life got replayed in front of him... specially the moments with the girl from the big bad city... the meeting, the exhange, the breakup and etc and etc and he yelled out "Gowthami...."
From heavens above and on the newly constructed four lane to the earth was coming, a white sedan with Yamadhoothas(Agents of death). They were driving smoothly and they were not aware of the vishnu doothas(guardian angels) who were just behind them in the bLUE maruthi omni. Yamadhootas didn't seem to take the warning, "objects appearing in the mirror may be closer than they appear" very seriously. But after some time, they realized that vishnudoothas were gaining speed. Yama dhootha's didn't want to lose a prey this time around and stepped on the gas and the chase ensued. Though they didn't had a advanced vehicle, the vishnu doothas had their lords name in their favor. One "jai shri raam" and their maruthi moved like a lighting and they touched the base. Before the yamadhoothas could even lay their fingers on Prads, vishnudoothas had formed a vyuha around the young man with their semi automatic weapons pointed at the yamadhootas

One of the yamadhootas spoke out, "Comon!!! Why this time around?.This guy is a not a ardent devotee of the almighty. He is just a wastrel.He wastes his time thinking of a girl who doesn't even care for his existence..."
Vishnudoothas spoked out, "That is selflessness,a good quality... loving someone without expecting to be loved back. And our lord is present in all good qualities" Swats who was nearby swung into action and shouted out, "That's not selflessness.. that's stupidity... yearning for something that cannot be achieved"
Yamadhootas loved it and asked her, "You should have been with us when we went to pick the souls of Savithri's husband, markendeya and ajamila.Gosh... its time Yama, recruited such bright youngsters.. directly from the campus"

Yamadhootas said very bluntly to the vishnudoothas, "Whatever it is... We were just instructed not to touch a guy who remembers god during his final breaths... here he has not done that na... so how come you are obstructing our job?"
Vishnudoothas smiled and said, "Naa... you have wrongly misinterpreted our lord's words.Our lord hari is everywhere.. and when a human acknowledges it, it is like remembering God... This guy Prads saw God in his girl Gowthami...and that way he has remembered our lord"
Swats could not control herself laughing out aloud at this statement and pointing finger at the vishnudootha who made that statement she commented, "And this guy must have seen Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi last night and must have fallen in love with the song... tujh mein rab diktha hain... yaara mein kya karoon..."

Yamadhoothas loved it and looked at their new 'recruit' for more guidance and to help them out.Swats gave her opinion in favour of the yamadhoothas, "If that is the case, no one in the world can be taken... Everyone is living for someone. A mother sees God in her new born baby. For a loving husband, his wife is the goddess, A devoted son would serve his parents and treat them at par with Gods. And I am one who believes in Acharya devobava... If what you say of seeing god in someone as the criteria for not touching a soul, then Japan should have been left untouched..." and then Swats thought practically and continued, "If you really stick to that dogma, What would happen to the world? It would become frozen with no deaths hardly happening..." Vishnudoothas were speechless and looked at each others faces.
Suddenly Prads rose up from his slumber and shouted at Swats,"Are you hell bent on seeing me dead... TEEK HAIN... MERI MAA... I will do as you say."
Everybody in the bus turned to Prads who suddenly had brought the bus to a halt...
Swats was embarrassed as everyone in the bus was looking at them, "Were you seeing a bad dream?"
Prads looked at her and replied, "No! Was just realizing that there's no escaping from a good friend like you..."

Monday, February 14, 2011

Angry Young Woman

Unintentionally Prads had become the cause for Surendra's misery. His girl fell for Prads' charisma and prads's gud friend Swats was doing the damage control exercise. She tried to get the new girl Karthika out of Surendra's mind, "She is so fickle-minded... if she can so easily change her mind, think of what will happen to you, if she had met Prads after the marriage.. Every thing happens for good, baba"

Surendra fell for it very easily but put forward his fear, "But she looks like an angel. How can I let her go. And mother says, girls would easily forget everything once they get married..."
Swats felt like laughing, "Your mother still reads you bedtime stories. You should listen to the old elvis pressly song. He had advised boys so beautifully, 'she looks like a angel, she walks like a angel, she talks like a angel. But I got wise. She was a devil in disguise."
Sweet words of Swats made Surendra forget the lessons his mother had taught him.

Just then Prads entered and he was very mad and yells at Surendra, "That girl Karthika has gone mad. She came to my house and asked my mother for my hand. My mother first thought the girl was asking her son's hand to push some vehicle which had got stuck... She has left me confused!!!"
Swats suddenly turned to Prads, "What! A girl had come to your doorsteps and standing on her toes she had asked for you as her life partner and you have sent her away dejected.. Great! what kind of a fool you are?:"
Surendra couldn't believe what he was hearing, " You are two tongued... Gosh! All girls are confusing,,,"

Prads agreed with him, "Agreed ! After many days I got in touch with the girl from the big bad city and she messages me back, 'May I know who is this'"
Swats felt like slapping her friend Prads, "What! You tried to open a closed chapter....You very well know that you should stop looking backward and start moving forward" Prads answered her very slowly, "I know when to stop. I know when to let things go. I know when to move on. But “I know” is different from 'I can'",
Swats got really mad and she fired her anger at Surendra, "And you Mr Surendra! Listen! Don't do the mistake made by Prads... This girl Kathika is a closed chapter for you...Forget her!!!"
Surendra felf very strange, "Swasthee! First make up your mind, whom do you want to scold! Me or Prads!"

Swats felt very tired, "I think all boys are alike! All boys need to be put before the firing squad and shot at..." Leaving the sentence unfinished she starts departing from the place."
Surendra couldn't understand what was happening in Swats mind and remarked to Prads, "She is so wrong... naa...?"
Prads thinks about it and says, "No!She is very strong..." saying so, he proceeds to stop her and bowing down his head, "Tell me, my majesty! what should I be doing next? Proposing to karthika..."
Surendra left another shriek which no one would care to, :"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Conditions Apply

The old man at the reception counter in the hotel looked with curiosity at the man in his thirties sitting with two girls in the late teens.It was Prads and his two good friends Swats and Jeevs.
Prads was called to the hotel by his friend Surendra who said it was urgent. But Surendra had not yet arrived. Prads kept looking at the entrance and a beautiful lady in the late twenties arrived and marched straight towards Prads table. The old man at the reception counter just thought "Lucky Bustard..." and continued with his work.
The young lady extended her hand and made her introduction, "Hi... I am Karthika... Mom told me I can meet you here,,,,"

Prads was surprised and quickly guessed that this girl had come to meet Surendra and had mistaken him for Surendra. Without waiting for Prads to make his introduction, Karthika continued, "My mother must have told you about me. Still before you give your opinion on the alliance...I need to tell you about some conditions"
Swats and Jeevs were loving it and widening their eyes, cried out, "Marriage Alliance!"
Karthika was curious about the teenagers, "Who are these two girls... Mom told me you didn't had any sisters"
Jeevs answered, "We are his bodyguards. In this Gor kali yug, it is difficult for a single handsome bachelor to roam the streets freely. So we are here for his security. But you can talk... we will not interfere"

Swats made the introduction with just two words "Good Friends." Karthika didn't question them further and looking directly into Prad's eyes, put forth her condition, "I don't want to have kids for at least next three years..."
Prads' jaws dropped down and he again tried to interrupt the girl. Swats coughed a little,hinting Prads not to stop the fun. She tried to give a glimpse of Prad's dreams to Karthika, "You know... My Good Friend was just talking about how he would like to gift his wife with a baby girl - a miniature version of herself on their first wedding anniversary... Am I right, Prads"
Prads with a smiling face nodded his head, "Completely... Definitely...." and in a filmy tone added, "I want to make my mom and dad, grandparents at the earliest"

Karthika tried to talk some sense into him, "Hmm... Its our life... We need to set our life and get our priorities right and then only we can think of starting a family...Don't you agree"
Jeevs didn't want to be left out of the fun, "You need a year and more for setting priorities. I believe you can do it before the dosa we ordered comes"
Swats also discouraged Karthika's view, "You know my grandparents had ten children. They never bothered about how to take care of them or give them the best. My granny used to tell me that grandpa always said, "God is there... He will show a way""

Karthika was literally fuming with anger, "Mr Prospective Bridegroom!!! I have not come for a group discussion here with some silly teenagers. Is my condition very clear to you???"
Prads found her conditions somewhat unethical as he reasoned out, "Why are you marrying anyway? If you put such a condition, wouldn't it be wrong. Think about it ethically. I feel that such a condition would make one look like selfish. It seems the one making such a condition wants just the fun out of the marriage and not the responsibility arising out of it. Remember a quote from Kahlil Gibran, 'Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.' So why interrupt such a natural process. Its my view and I would like to stick to it. I am not asking you to agree with it. But I don't want to argue any further..."

Karthika was taken aback when the polite Prads ended his thought with such a statement.
Prads made it clear that he was not being impolite, "I don't want to argue any more because here comes the man of the moment. Your prospective bridegroom!"
Prads friend Surendra made his entrance and extended his hand, "Sorry! Got stuck in traffic.. "
Karthika looked at him for a moment and then turned towards Prads, "But I like you... I like a man who sticks to his viewpoint strongly... however silly and absurd it might be. That's what I want in a man." Saying so, she walked away without even giving Surendra, another look.
Swats immediately quizzed Jeevs, "What was the song in Sangam that Raj Kumar croons when his best friend steals his girl?"
Surendra himself started singing that song very emotionally and the girls gave him the chorus, "Dost Dost Na Raha... Pyar Pyar Na Raha..."

Monday, January 31, 2011

Heal the heart and make it a better place.

Swats is sitting on the beach with Prads and enjoying the Sunset. She also had more company in the form of Prad's friend Surendra, A middle aged lecturer,tall but very lean. Surendra proudly announces 'Ab tak chappan!' Prads describes his friends slogan to the confused Swats, "Don't worry! He is not telling his murder count. All he wants to say is that he has so far seen that many girls...Marriage proposals, to be precise. But no one has said yes to him... but still he goes on and on and on..." Swats felt that Prads was mocking at his friend. At that point, the Surendra sings "yeh hosla kaise jhuke...:" from the movie dor. Swats felt as if she was watching Popeye. She smiled at Surendar and turning to Prads, "At least he is not sticking to something which is not achievable like you... " and turning to Surendra, "How do you do that? I mean how are you so positive"

Surendra in a very soothing voice explains his secret, "Because I know that the future is beautiful... All I have to do is keep my hope floating" Swats wishes "Gosh!!! If only I knew the future of Prads... I could have convinced him...." Surendra takes his spectacles and gives it to Swats who is taken by surprise, "Wear this and you will be able to get some picture of his future?"
For some it would be difficult to believe in miracles... but for Swats it has become a norm.

And she put on the specs and the sea in front of her disappeared.Instead of that she saw a garden and a young girl of six years old skipping in the garden along with a kitten. Swats without taking her eye off the child questioned Surendra, "You told me I would be able to see the future... All I am able is to see a young girl playing with a kitten!!!... is this Pogo Channel?... Is this specs like DTH?... Direct to home now made as Direct to eyes....DTE!!!"
Surendra laughs at the joke, "See her properly and try to recognize her..."
Swats was able to guess the features, "Gosh! Same nose! Same eyes! She looks like Prads... You mean! uski bachchi..." She was more curious and looked at the benches nearby "And Where is the mother? Where is Prad's future wife?"

Just then a man came near to the girl and hugged her. His hairstyle resembled Akshay Khanna's and his stomach seemed to have grown a lot. He called the girl very sweetly "Swasthee... Come to Pa". Swats was thrilled to hear her name and a smile came on her lips and tears in her eyes. But she was angry at what Prads had done to himself, "Gosh! whatever happened to Prads in the future? Look at him in the present. He is so athletic " Prads was completely unaware of the happening. He was watching the sunset and was totally immersed in it. Surendra tried to answer her question, "May be that's what happens when a man gets lots of love and happiness in life"

Swats herself had forgotten the question and was more curious of the girl in Prad's future "where is the mother of the girl?" It seems the young girl heard her and she too started crying "I want my mother. I want her before the moon comes on the sky" Prads comforted the gal "Have patience, Swasthee... She will come now.... You know your mother is like that.... She makes one wait..."
The young girl suddenly asked "Is my mother your first love?"
Prads answered with a twinkle in his eye "No! I was in such a stage when love and pain became synonyms to me... But when I felt that pain was beyond bearable, your mother made her entry" and suddenly the young girl ran towards the garden entrance shouting gleefully, "Mummy!!! Mummy!!!" Before Swats could get a clear view of the mother... the vision gets blurred and suddenly it went blank. After some time,the usual Doordarshan multi-colored interruption signal appeared in front of her eyes and then the words in block letters SORRY FOR THE INTERRUPTION"

Swats was very mad at Surendra "What the hell! I want to SEE the girl in Prads life and I want to see her NOW!!! " Surendra shrugged his shoulders, "But you cannot."
Swats was very near to break his neck,"And may I know why?"
Surender smiled and answered, "Had one been able to see his girl he would get in his life... I wouldn't be here.... I would have been at home cooking for my wife... and the count would have been just one"
Swats got very frustrated and just started walking away.Surendra stopped her and comforted her, "Its not the exact future you saw.. Its the future you want for him that you saw." and after a pause, he added, "Don't worry about Prads. He will come out of the pain or whatever he is going through.. But you be there with him...No matter who broke his heart, or how long it takes to heal, he'll never get through it without his friends.... Remember that"

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Cupid Strikes - The Inception Way

Swasthee or Swats really wanted her elder friend Prads to fall in love. She even had the ideal girl selected for him - her good friend Jeevs. But she didn't like what was happening in front of her - Prads and Jeevs were gazing at the computer screen and studying the share market basics and there didn't seem to be any chemistry between them whatsoever. She looked at the heavens above for some miracle and suddenly, down dropped a handsome hunk with a bow and a arrow in his hand. He definitely looked to have come from the outer world. Swats wanted his introduction, "Err... You definitely don't seem to be from this world. Don't tell me you are from Pandora..."
The guy shrugged his shoulders and with surprise exclaimed, "Even I have to give a introduction!! Kya Gor Kalyug Hain? Doesn't this bow and arrows made of flowers suggest you something??? I am the Love God, Manmatha!!! I was able to read your beautiful mind and its small desire for your friend. So I just told to myself, 'Lets make her day'. Lets not waste time over here. Where is your good friend and the girl. I will make him fall in love very quickly..."

Swats pointed her finger at Prads and Jeevs. Manmatha's face showed some disappointment," This is definitely not a suitable place for romance. Yups there are beautiful curves... but they are on the television screen and that too not of individuals but of corporates showing their profit growths. I can see lots of figures but disappointingly they are from the annual reports and balance sheets. Everyone has just money in their mind. Here only brain is working. Love needs a place where heart is put into motion.... I need to summon my team..."
Swats immediately displayed her knowledge of mythology, "You mean... your beautiful wife.. Rati Devi...Right?"
Manmatha smiled at her, "Wrong... She has lots of household chores to attend... I have taken the team of Cobb's after I saw them in Nolan's Inception."
And in the next instance, The gorgeous Architect Ariadne appeared who was immediately put to work by Manmatha, "Change this place to a one which is more suitable for romance. Study the wavelengths of his heart..."

Swats really enjoyed the events that happened in front of the eyes. Before she could even blink her eyes, she found herself standing in the middle of a fifty feet road with shops on both the sides. It was evening with a hour to go for the sun to set and add to it the cool breeze. The weather was quite romantic indeed. She found Prads and Jeevs ordering a samosa in a nearby eating joint. Manmatha invited Swats for a coffee in the self-service restaurant opposite to the eating joint.
Manmatha loved the excitement on Swats face and hissed, "There's more to come" and he took out his love bow and pointing it towards the heaven, uttered a mantra. Swats expected the arrow of the cupid to appear. But rather a white gentleman popped up and Manmatha introduced him, "This is Earnes, the forger. He can prepare a identity." Swats surely didn't understand even a word of what Manmatha said. Manmatha instructed the forger, "All you need to do is to find out as to what kind of girl would Prads fall for and give Jeevs that identity." It didn't take the forger much time as within a minute Jeevs appearance changed. Her Churidhar made way for a jeans and full sleeves brown shirt. Her hair got trimmed till the neck and a small white purse-like bag appeared in her hand.
Jeevs who experienced the change looked around and in a very filmy fashion shouted, "Oh God! Mere Kapde...... Kisne badla?"

Swats totally loved the happenings and looked towards love God for more action. He took out the arrow and instead of shooting it, used it like a wizards wand and chanted the mantra "Expecto Patronum". Swats expected another handsome gentleman. But to her displeasure, the fat chemist Yusuf appeared. Manmatha sipped his coffee and instructed, "Use your knowledge of sedatives and mix something in the milkshake he has ordered so that he can succumb to the charms of that girl."
It took the waiter hella lot of time to get the milkshake. The same was served to Prads with the sedative. He drank it very slowly and Swats felt that he was doing so to spend more time with Jeevs. Was he already under its effect? It looked so from his amorous eyes.

He kept the glass down and clearing his throat spoke gently, "Tell me Gowthami. Did you like the books?"
Jeevs got mad and turning around shouted, "Foul Play! I am not Gowthami!!"
And in the very next moment, they were back to square one watching the sensex come crumbling down just like Swats hopes.
She looked at Manmatha for a explanation. He put his face down and out of the blue appeared another of his team member, Arthur, the researcher. He spoke, "You have completely forgotten me. You have not done homework on this guy. Now let me tell you why the exercise failed. Prads is still in love with the girl who had told him to his face that he didn't have any place in her life, not even as a friend. But he still carries feelings for her. And these feelings don't die easily because he feeds them with her memories. That eating joint, that fifty feet road, the samosa, the white bag - everything is taken from his memory which has a strong association with her. He is struggling with her memories that has manifested here and sabotaged your efforts."
Swats got the lesson from this and she spoke with some wisdom, "I get it... Its easy to fall in love... but not so easy to fall out of love..."
Manmatha agreed, "Yups! Seems like a hopeless case to me"
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Edhey Thumbi Haaduvenu by CA Suresh Kumar is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at srisureshca.blogspot.com.
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