Saturday, January 24, 2009

Scumbag Billionaire ?

Prem had to make arrangements to transport (thats the word he wanted to use) his aunt's daughter to the temple city nearby. The girl named Arpitha had some offerings to be given to some God. Arpitha was a young lady who rarely spoke and if she did, it was something senseless. Prem's old neighbour and a police chief, Ali volunteered to take them early morning as he had a job next day to transport a popular convict in his personal vehicle so as to avoid public and the media attention.
Thus Prem started the journey with this strange girl and a gentleman prisoner whom Ali loved to call Scumbag Billionaire. Prem found the convict and Arpitha similar as both of them rarely opened their mouths. Ali briefed them up on the convicts history. The convict had duped the investors and bankers of their hard earned money. In that small town, he had promised to bring a software revolution and he did. The employees and the investors revolted against him and now he was in handcuffs. He was being transported to the bigger Bellary Jail.

At that time, Prem's mobile rang. It was from one of the private FM channels. The RJ seemed to be overexcited as she announced in a high pitch, "Mr Prem, You have been selected to win two tickets to the Sunday show of Slumdog Millionaire. All you have to do is to answer these three simple questions. You are really lucky sir..."
Prem wanted to comment, 'Yeah! Really lucky. On a sunday morning, when I should be in the bed forgetting that the world existed, here I am on a bumpy road in this cold weather with a tough cop, a soft criminal and a strange girl.... and to add to this... irritating voice of yours' But he just blurted out in a mood less manner, "Shoot out the questions"

The RJ who liked to call herself a adorable girl, started the question and answer session,"First Question. Who wrote Hanuman Chalis? Those chalis stanzas...I hope you know them....." Prem had heard about them but knew very less about Hanuman and the chalis stanzas, "If you ask me about Alibaba and his chalis theives, I could tell something, but ...." At that point the convict took a very small and thin book from his pocket and handed it to Prem, "Hanuman Chalis by Tulsidas. It had helped me to overcome many obstacles in my business deals..." There was the answer to the RJ's question.
Ali had this sarcastic remark for the convict's answer "Seems like you used your God as an unwilling partner in your crime deeds."
And Arpita... she had already started chanting Hanuman chalisa with her closed eyes.

The RJ moved towards the next question, "Are you ready for the next question ? Who is the largest employer in the world ?... I know its a bit hard... So I give you two choices.... The Indian Railways or the Mumbai Underworld...".
Prem was about to ask, 'Whether she earlier worked on rolls for the mumbai underworld', but answered, "Indian Railways." At that moment, the convict laughed loudly, "Had they given a chance, I would have beaten that record.... "
Ali came forward to explain to Prem, "On records, he shows 1000 employees. But when we went there, we found 500 only. What happened to others?" Arpitha just erupted without warning, "OMG! Ethnic Cleansing?" Ali shouted, "Ethnic Cleansing! That's a stupid thing to say. He is not Taliban or Saddam, he is a CEO of a software company. He showed dummy employees on the payroll", then like a thinking man, Ali continued, "And don't equate job cuts with ethnic cleansing."

RJ proceeded, "We will move to the last question. Name the movie starring Junior Big B and directed by Mani Ratnam which was about a businessman who uses unethical means to succeed in business...." The RJ also added, "I personally like those last few minutes when he fights back..... Any Guesses"
The convict just imitated Abhishek as he spoke the dialogs from the movie, "Agar paisa ban sakta tha, to main ne banaya hai.Lekin sirf apne liye nahi , apne 30 lakhs shareholders ke liye bhi. (Wherever there was a opportunity to make money, I had cashed on the same. But not for myself, but for my 30 lakh shareholders). Truly said by Gurukanth Desai or Guru"
Thus the answer to the 3rd question was also given,while Ali remarked in a very thoughtful manner, "If we were to put all people who use unethical means behind bars, then I think we have to build a fence around planet earth itself"
And Arpita was humming a song from the movie Guru and that too the same line repeatedly, " Ta Ra Rum, Ta Ra Mast Mast / Ta Ra Rum, Ta Ra Rum, Ta Ra Mast Mast / Ta Ra Rum, Ta Rum Pum / Ta Rum Pum..." . It continued till the vehicle reached their destination.

As they got down, the convict had a special request to Prem, "Do also Pray for me." Prem replied back,"Yes, I will pray. But not for you. I will pray for your investors and employees...."


Arjun said...

Hi Suresh.. seen you many times on Cindrella's blog. Nice to read your blogs.

Tara said...

Good job there! Prem and his adventures... :)

abhishek said...

*sniff...sniff* smells like raju ;)

Lena said...

that was another good chapter of prem's adventure. You never disappoint :)

Cяystal said...

That was a neat part of Mr.Prem's adventure.
My request-Would like to here something new..and diff. from the regular Prem stories. PleasE!


Hi Suresh,

Thanks for ur information.

moi said...

hey its full bollywood masala...but from the real life stories!! Need simran immediately, she seems to be no where!!

Suresh Kumar said...

@ Arjun
Nice to c u around my blogs

@ Tara

@ Abhishek
Well... I wanted to say that most people use unethical means... some succeed... those who don't go to gallows

@ Lena

@ Crystal
Hmm.... will try....

@ Moi
Simran is always there in Prem's heart.

Charmed One! said...

Prem is real helpful soul :) !!
I loved the last line :)..
Yes, I will pray. But not for you. I will pray for your investors and employees....

Keshi said...

Good one again! I like the title Suresh :)


Suresh Kumar said...

Thx charmed one and keshi.

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